If you were my son

We have all heard the story this week of the man who raped an unconscious women behind a rubbish bin in an alley way. I have tried to avoid this story because I feel like I already know it too well. A man rapes a women who is unconscious, gets caught, goes to court and gets less time in jail than people caught smoking pot.

Not only were his actions shameful and disgusting his own father wrote a statement that made my blood curdle. Not only defending his actions but continuing to say how hard this experience had been on his all star son. As a parent this filled me with a rage I can’t describe. As the mother of a daughter it terrifies me.

Since when do we see someone unconscious and instead of calling for help we drag their body to a dark place and assault them. Alcohol to a rapist is the gun to a murderer, it’s a tool to make the violence easier but lack of it won’t stop them.

We have also heard of the other two young men who ran to intervene when they saw what he was doing, they are obviously being praised for their actions and rightly so. If they had not gone to help her who knows how this situation could have unfolded. To those men thank you for being human beings.

To rape is to take away the only real right of a person, the right to choose what happens to their body. To excuse this behavior is to not recognise a women as a person, and more as a object. Women are not here for you to have sex with, women are not at fault for your shitty, shameful and cowardly decisions. You can not use a women’s short skirt or flirty behaviour as a excuse to violate and abuse her. You violated and abused her because you wanted to and you believed your rights superior to her. You raped her because you are a scumbag who hasn’t learnt how to treat people correctly, who doesn’t think of a women as a human being. A rapist is someone who should have to pay for what they have done, who should be made to realise what having your rights away feels like. The scars that the victims feel will take longer to heal than your couple of months in jail. Yes you are a sex offender, you preyed on a women while she was incapacitated and unable to make the decision to have sex and you did it anyway. You only stopped because you got caught and you ran away because you are a coward. You are not a man, you are not even a human being. You are the darkness of the world.

I myself have never been rapped but I have been in a situation that could have escalated if it hadn’t been for one his own friends stepping in. I have also taken very drunk friends home to my house as a young teen for their own safety. This is what should happen, if you see someone at a party getting too drunk, passing out or getting into a bad situation, step in, help, call for help. This is what people do, this is what sets human beings apart from other species of animals with only basic instincts.

To parents, raise your kids to have empathy, compassion, drive to do the right thing and don’t ever excuse their bad behaviour, let them see consequences, teach them about how their actions affect others and teach them that other people have feelings just as they do.

I feel like this blog post is pretty all over the place and not very well written but I just had to say something.

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